Being happy doesn’t depend solely on ourselves. We are social animals, and our relationships significantly impact our mental health. As psychologist Margalida de la Rosa Alzamora explains in an article about how social relationships influence our happiness, “Aristotle already said that man is a social being by nature. It has been shown that we need others from the very first moments of our life, not just for care and protection in the early years, or as a form of social organisation in adulthood.”
The importance of relationships for happiness
Relationships, whether romantic, work-related, or family, are part of our construction, and part of happiness is hidden in these bonds. Raquel López, a psychologist at the Laura Jorge Nutrition and Psychology Center, is a happiness expert and has a clear message: being happy is cultivated daily.
The psychology professional points out that there are several phrases we can say daily to care for and strengthen our bonds. Improving how we communicate with others helps open a path to our inner selves. Although it may be difficult to try to change our way of relating, the effort is worth it.
“It’s okay not to be okay”
Accepting the less sweet sides of our lives is key to having the tools to improve this situation, both alone and in society. “Although it may seem paradoxical, allowing the other person to feel any emotion helps them feel validated and not judged,” López highlights. Moreover, she emphasises that “teaching others that all emotions are valid is a great gift.”
“I like that you are my friend/mother/partner because…”
Sometimes, it is difficult to open our hearts and talk about feelings, but it is necessary. “It doesn’t cost anything to reaffirm the reasons that make you proud of that relationship,” the expert emphasises an exercise that becomes simple with practice. Also, “it will make you and that life companion feel good.”
“I understand you, but I would like for the future (think about your need) because this hurts me”
Being assertive in our way of communicating avoids many misunderstandings. The mistake sometimes lies in how we say things, not in the content of the message. “Setting boundaries helps you have safer relationships and allows the other person to know you better and act accordingly,” the psychologist argues.
“I’m sorry, but no”
Setting boundaries is one of the main challenges for many people who always prioritize the desires of others over their own. “If you find it difficult to say ‘no,’ review what consequences this might be having in your life,” López advises. Surely, part of your sadness or anxiety stems from some area of your life where you don’t feel free.
“I feel grateful for…”
As the Nigerian proverb goes, being grateful is a sign of a good upbringing. Without a doubt, practicing gratitude is an exercise that helps us open our minds and give a 180-degree turn to our life perspective. “Daily gratitude is a very valuable therapeutic strategy,” says the mental health professional. “Giving thanks and creating spaces to focus on positive aspects of your life helps you interpret your life more safely and kindly,” she notes.
This article was syndicated from Marie Claire Spain
Translated and adapted by Praise Vandeh, Marie Claire Nigeria Content Writer
