“Make babies, but don’t look like you did” — 21st century men

“My husband said his favourite part of a woman is a flat stomach.”— A pregnant woman

More times than we’d like to admit, the thrill of women discovering a new pregnancy and sharing the news with family and friends is quickly overshadowed by a troubling reality, comments from the same people on weight and appearance. “Don’t lose yourself!” “Don’t gain too much!” “You need to watch what you eat!’

One woman shares her experience, “My husband said his favorite part of a woman is a flat stomach. I cried for two hours. I was 24 weeks at the time, and I had just asked him if he preferred boobs or butts, since I felt like my booty and boobs were looking pretty good from the weight gain and was trying to be flirty.” 

Famous women are not left out, and in fact, get a ridiculous amount of scrutiny when their bodies are inevitably altered by pregnancy. 

These unrealistic expectations may cause women to develop mental health issues, including body dysmorphia. A study on Maternal Mental Health During Pregnancy reveals that a significant amount of pregnant women struggle with depression and anxiety during pregnancy. It also extends to causing strained relationships with partners and family members who ought to be support systems for pregnant women.

Fat shaming pregnant women will always be distasteful

Recently, Margot Robbie, 34, was photographed on a day out on the water on Palmarola Island on Thursday, alongside her husband Tom Ackerley. The Barbie star’s growing baby bump was on full display with Robbie pictured wearing a black bikini as she enjoyed her time.

Margot Robbie photographed on a day out, via news.com.au
Margot Robbie photographed on a day out, via news.com.au

However, this has left the mum-to-be a target for trolls who shamefully wrote cruel comments online about how Margot isn’t sexy anymore. 

 Aside Margot, many other famous women including Kim Kardashian, Christy Teigen, Nigeria’s Tonto Dike and the wife of an ex-BBN star, Chioma have been the subject of trolls for getting pregnant and having their bodies change

@9japr247 Have you ever been body shamed during pregnancy? #9japr247 Watch the full episode of @mumsnextdoor ♬ original sound – 9jaPR247

The pressure to conform to beauty norms can be suffocating for pregnant women during this process of creating a whole new life, often leading to anxiety, self-doubt, and a distorted view of what it means to be a healthy, happy mother. This raises important questions about society’s expectations of what pregnant women need to thrive.

Being a happy mother is crucial to the baby’s health

Realistic depiction of how pregnancy changes a woman’s body, via @audreynsanti Tiktok

Recent research suggests that nearly two-thirds of pregnant and postpartum women experience some form of weight stigma. In one study, 501 pregnant and postpartum women reported experiencing weight stigma from multiple people and places. They may also engage in extreme dieting or exercise that compromises their physical health, leading to difficulty in pregnancy or childbirth. 

However, research has proven that women surrounded with positivity tend to engage in more positive behaviour during their pregnancy such as having a healthy diet, and engaging in regular physical activity, leading to optimal birth outcomes such as full-term deliveries, normal birth weight, and early breastfeeding initiation.

Women are embracing their pregnancy journey

Realistic depiction of how pregnancy changes a woman’s body, via Essence

Being pregnant today may seem like facing a barrage of opinions and judgments about your body, your choices, and your health under constant scrutiny from everyone. Gaining weight opens you to fat-shaming. Trying to stay slim also brings worries about your baby’s well-being. Exercise, and you’re selfish. 

However, women are pushing back against harmful expectations, critiquing snap-back culture and unrealistic postpartum standards by discussing once-forbidden topics openly and demystifying myths surrounding pregnancies. From popular singer Simi, sharing how pregnancy affected her eyesight, to Ini Edo’s openness about her reason for opting for surrogacy and other women being open about struggling with weight post-pregnancy, every woman can find support systems amongst each other.

The celebration of every pregnancy journey

Celebrating pregnant women, via Shutterstock

Pregnancy is a miraculous journey that brings immense joy and anticipation for the arrival of new life.  It’s a process that takes a toll on women’s bodies, and mental and physical health. Normalising these narratives allows for an inclusive and empowering representation of motherhood – one that celebrates diversity, promotes self-love, and supports women’s well-being which in turn allows for a better birthing experience.

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