The power of choosing to be childfree

Ever felt like you’re the odd one out in a sea of baby announcements and first birthday parties? Yeah, been there, done that. It’s like suddenly you’re starring in a sitcom where everyone’s got a script about babies, and you’re ad-libbing your way through life.

So, you keep doing you, ignoring society’s nudges and your auntie’s pointed glances. Maybe you jet off on that dream holiday, switch up jobs or cities, or bid farewell to that ‘solid’ but snooze-worthy partner your friends rave about. But then, curiosity strikes, and you find yourself Googling… and lo and behold, you stumble upon a whole community of childfree folks who are not just existing but thriving – and they’re loud about it!

Harpy: A Manifesto for Childfree Women via Amazon

Before I went into writing my book, “Harpy: A Manifesto for Childfree Women,” I was what you’d call a childfree lurker. You know, keeping quiet, minding my business, but secretly rolling my eyes at the endless barrage of questions and opinions. “You’ll change your mind, won’t you?” “Aren’t you scared of dying alone?” Oh, the joys of unsolicited advice!

But here’s the kicker: I realised there’s power in our choices, in saying, “Nah, this path is not for me.” So, armed with tales of my own experiences and those of 55 incredible women from all corners of the globe, I set out to tell our stories – the good, the bad, and the downright hilarious.

There is power in recognising that you’re alright as you are and living accordingly.

And let me tell you, it’s been a rollercoaster. Once word got out that I was writing about being childfree, everyone and their dog wanted to chat. But instead of pitying glances, I found genuine curiosity and even solidarity from unexpected quarters. Colleagues I never pegged as childfree proudly shared their stories, and strangers reached out with words of encouragement.

Through it all, I’ve heard tales of women embracing their passions – whether that’s devouring biscuits while lost in a book or pursuing creative endeavours without a care in the world. There’s strength in owning who you are and living life on your terms, whether you go by ‘childfree,’ ‘voluntarily childless,’ or simply, “I don’t want kids.”

Since I’ve come out as childfree, my life is immeasurably better – I wish I’d been more honest years ago.

As for me, since embracing my childfree status, life’s been one big adventure. Take tomorrow night, for example – dinner with friends at that Italian joint I’ve been raving about. We bonded over our shared love for hearty meals and mutual disdain for small plates and orange wine. It’s these moments, these connections, that make me grateful for choosing my path.

So, if you’re out there questioning the status quo, know this: you’re not alone. There’s a vibrant community waiting to welcome you with open arms. And as for the sceptics and naysayers? Well, let them talk – we’ve got better things to do, like living our best child-free lives. Cheers to that!

This article was syndicated from Marie Claire UK
Translated and adapted by Praise Vandeh, Marie Claire Nigeria Content Writer


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