Don’t you just love listening to men who think they “know” women? I’ve had a long day rolling my eyes and kissing my teeth just from listening to self-proclaimed relationship gurus who perpetrate unrealistic expectations and harmful stereotypes about women. I believe it’s time to call out the nonsense and set the record straight.
In this article, I’ll debunk some of the most laughable pieces of advice from one man in particular who’s making rounds on the internet, “@luisolivas”, and shedding light on what reality and research say about women.
Let’s get into it:
Women prioritise their own happiness
A woman’s life is often defined by a series of selfless sacrifices, made as a daughter, wife, mother, and partner. Across relationships and lifetimes, women consistently prioritise the happiness of others over their own. But have you ever stopped to imagine a world where women prioritise themselves? A world where our own desires, dreams, and well-being take centre stage. What would happen if women chose to put themselves first, just once?
If women didn’t have to go through nine months or more and sacrifice our bodies risking lifelong side effects to make men happy by birthing children who bear their last name and carry on their lineage.
If women didn’t stay in unhealthy marriages to protect the happiness of their children and the reputation of their men.
If women pursued their own dreams and career goals as opposed to being segregated to taking care of the home while their men got ahead with their careers
Now that I think about it, women should chase their own happiness instead and be proud of it. And good riddance to men offended by it.
Our friends are toxic
“A woman with friends is a red flag, they’ll control her”. “If a woman doesn’t have friends, something is wrong with her and she’s a red flag”. Not like we care but men, pick a struggle, please!
Women’s friendships are a powerful force in our lives. These relationships provide a sanctuary of sanity-savers, confidantes, fierce protectors and soul-sisters, and we make each other feel seen, heard and understood. Half the time, those “lonely friends” as Luis calls them can smell men’s intentions from a mile away and the other times, men are simply intimidated by how good our female friends treat us which makes it hard to isolate us from support.
If they are “good men” like Luis claims, our friends would like them for us because they see how good they treat us and how happy we are with them. Luis, drop your mic.
Women are toxic when they make money
Oh yes! Luis, women definitely feel like they do not need men. Let’s all pretend our economic system wasn’t built by men who continue to make the rules, reap the lion’s share of the benefit and own 50% more wealth than women. Let us pretend that 22 of the world’s richest men do not own more wealth than all 325 million women in Africa combined and let us pretend that men do not dump women who have stood by them through years of hardship to go for seemingly “better” women after they come into good money.
To all the women in the world, I hope you make enough money to get every single thing you want without needing a man to “spoil” you first.
Privacy means secrecy
I once had a man ask me what I was hiding for having a password on my phone. I said, “I’m keeping my family and friends’ conversation safe from nosy people like you.” If you have insecurities, don’t project them on women. If you have trust issues, don’t project them on women.
Dear men, I have a wild solution you probably never thought of, if you do not trust your partner, maybe don’t be with them, rather than project your insecurities on them. Genius right? You’re welcome.
Women are jobless
Before I get into this one, I have a few questions. Are you married to her? Are you the air she breathes? Can she not have things going on in her life? Does she have kids with you? If No, why do you have an issue with a woman not texting you when you did not text her? More importantly, when did texting first become a determinant for how much a woman cared?
In conclusion
While I would like to elaborate on what women really want, I would rather end this with a personal letter to every “Luis”
Dear Luis,
Go be with your fellow man. It’s legal. There’s no shame in it.
Warm regards,
Women of the world.
