9 moments from the ‘Ballerina Farm’ interview that challenge trad wife narratives

Hannah Neeleman, known as ‘Ballerina Farm,’ has finally addressed the recent controversy surrounding her trad wife lifestyle and family dynamics.

Update: 2/8/2024

In a candid TikTok post, Hannah Neeleman responded to the backlash following her profile in The Times, which sparked a widespread debate about her role as a traditional wife. “A couple of weeks ago, a reporter came to our home to learn more about our family and business,” she explained. “We thought the interview went well, but we were taken aback by the printed article, which misrepresented our family and marriage, portraying me as oppressed and my husband as the antagonist. This couldn’t be further from the truth.”

@balllerinafarm What i’ve been thinking lately #hannahneeleman #ballerinafarm #ballerinafarmsourdough ♬ Listen to Your Heart – Jhonatan Rodrigues

She emphasised that nothing in the interview suggested such a conclusion, leading her to believe the article’s angle was predetermined. “For Daniel and me, our priority is God and family. Everything else comes second. The best day of my life was marrying Daniel 13 years ago. Together, we’ve built a business, welcomed eight children, and prioritised our marriage. We are co-parents, co-CEOs, and decision-makers. We are one, and I love him more today than I did back then.”

Hannah’s heartfelt message accompanied videos of her and Daniel working out, driving tractors with their children, and preparing meals together. She also updated the Ballerina Farm website with “Her Story,” detailing her life before ballet and meeting Daniel, which she directed her audience to in an Instagram post. You can read Hannah’s full response here.

The Times article, penned by Megan Agnew, received backlash from fans of the Neelemans and mothers on social media, who criticised its portrayal of Hannah’s lifestyle and parenting approach.

Here’s everything you need to know about the Neeleman saga, originally published on 29/07/2024.

Who Is Hannah Neeleman, aka ‘Ballerina Farm’?

Hannah Neeleman, 34, has become a prominent figure in the traditional wife TikTok trend and a successful influencer. Under the handle @ballerinafarm, she shares idyllic rural homemaking content from her 328-acre farm in Utah, where she lives with her husband, Daniel Neeleman, heir to a $400 million Jet Blue fortune. With 9.3 million followers on Instagram, 8.5 million on TikTok, and 1.6 million on YouTube, her online presence is substantial.

But what could a superstar influencer possibly want? Perhaps some peace and quiet after a tumultuous week of media scrutiny.

The former Juilliard-trained ballerina and reigning beauty pageant queen gave birth to her eighth child this year. She transitioned from social media success to Trad Wife fame after winning Mrs World just two weeks post-delivery. On July 20th, she went viral after a profile in *The Times*, where journalist Megan Agnew attempted to interview Hannah amid the chaos of her eight children and husband.

What is a trad wife?

If you’re not deeply immersed in social media, you may wonder what a “trad wife” is. The term refers to women who embody traditional values similar to those of past generations, often aligned with the principles of the Mormon faith, which many, including Neeleman, follow.

The trad wife focus on homemaking, and raising children, and often present a lifestyle that seemingly values subservience to their husbands. Unlike their grandmothers, they document their experiences on social media, leading to contentious discussions in feminist discourse. Critics argue they exemplify “choice” feminism, while others view them as a regressive influence, encouraging women to return to domestic roles.

@ballerinafarm Just in time for the holidays, baby #8 on approach! 💕 @Daniel ♬ original sound – Ballerina Farm

What happened during The Ballerina Farm interview?

The Times article, titled “Meet the Queen of the ‘Trad Wives’ (and her eight Children),” included quotes that suggested Hannah Neeleman was not the empowered influencer she appeared to be. Instead, it painted a picture of a woman trapped in a specific version of motherhood and wifedom.

TikTok’s reaction was swift and critical. One user lamented, “Ballerina Farm has ruined me. A talented woman with a full ride to Juilliard who gave up her dreams because of her millionaire husband.” Another stated, “Ballerina Farm broke me. May we always follow our dreams and never feel guilty about it.”

The hashtag #BallerinaFarmAbuse has garnered over 169 million views, with users interpreting comments from the interview as signs of coercive control. Some comments on Hannah’s recent videos include, “Girl, run and give him full custody,” and “Free Ballerina.”

So, how did things spiral for the Neelemans?

9 key revelations from the Ballerina Farm interview

1. No nannies in sight

Many assumed that wealthy influencers like Neeleman had a team of nannies to help manage their children. However, Hannah and Daniel handle all childcare themselves because Daniel reportedly “didn’t want nannies in the house.”

2. Weeks of exhaustion

The interview revealed that Hannah often spends weeks bedridden because of exhaustion, raising questions about who cares for their children during these times.

3. Inability to speak freely

Agnew noted the difficulty of interviewing Hannah, as her children and husband, who would correct and answer for her, often interrupted her.

4. A manipulated first date

According to comments during the interview, Daniel leveraged his privilege to arrange a seat next to Hannah on a flight to New York, pretending it was a coincidence. Many TikTok users found this behaviour unsettling.

5. Quitting ballet

Hannah saved her own money to attend Juilliard, but Daniel pushed for a quick marriage, leading to her cutting short her ballet career. She expressed regret over not pursuing her dreams.

6. No birth control

The Neelemans’ intense Mormon faith came to light, revealing that they do not use birth control and that all eight pregnancies were unplanned.

7. Pain relief only when alone

Hannah shared she gave birth to six of her eight children at home without pain relief. Interestingly, she mentioned she did use pain relief when her husband was not present during a particularly difficult labour.

8. No space for the ballerina

Despite her success, Hannah appears far from the queen of TikTok at home, with her ballet studio dreams replaced by a schoolroom for her children.

9. Underwhelming gifts

A viral TikTok video showcased Hannah receiving a makeshift egg-collecting apron as a birthday gift from Daniel, leading many to question the sincerity of their relationship.

What can we learn from the Ballerina Farm interview and the trad wife narrative?

Following the article’s publication, journalist Megan Agnew reflected on the impassioned social media response, acknowledging that Hannah Neeleman had become a focal point for debates surrounding motherhood and women’s choices.

The issues raised by the interview underscore the relentless demands women face, whether in the home or the workplace. While our grandmothers navigated domestic duties, today’s women grapple with burnout from both career and home responsibilities. It appears social media influencers, whether wearing egg-collecting aprons or glamorous gowns, are just as exhausted and vulnerable as the rest of us.

This article was syndicated from Marie Claire Australia
Translated and adapted by Praise Vandeh, Marie Claire Nigeria Content Writer

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