You don’t have to break the bank or lose your personal style to wear asoebi well. Here’s how I do it as a fashion editor.
Asoebi is more than a uniform in Nigeria. It is a cultural identity, a symbol of solidarity and a fashion statement. Sometimes, it is also a bit of a style challenge. Over the years, I’ve developed my own approach to wearing asoebi that blends personal style, practicality and a touch of drama (because, what’s an owambe without the drama?)
As a Yoruba woman, nobody does owambe quite like us. I was born into the asoebi lifestyle. As a child, my mum would always reserve one yard of fabric for me and make me the most beautiful outfit. One of my favourite parts of my traditional wedding was seeing families and friends dance in with their asoebi. That moment is when everyone sets aside their differences and recognises the need to present a united family front. The number one indicator is the uniform outfits.
This translated in my family as well. If my mum picks an asoebi from a previous event for church, no family drama could stop us from showing up in it. This is also why I like coordinating outfits with my husband. I believe it shows a united front and shared love for fashion.
Styling my asoebi is all about balance — respecting tradition while staying true to myself and prioritising sustainability. Here are my top tips:
Read also: Beyond the glamour — these five Nigerian wedding traditions speak volumes
I don’t buy every asoebi — and that’s okay
You don’t have to buy every asoebi. As a fashion editor and someone deeply invested in sustainable style, I’ve learnt to say no to the ones I don’t need. If I already have the colour — especially in a gorgeous fabric I can rework — I’ll respectfully decline. The only exception is if I’m one of the bride’s asoebi girls, then I’ll happily commit. That’s a responsibility I take seriously because I know exactly what that means to the bride.
This decision is about saving money, reducing waste and keeping my wardrobe filled with pieces I love and will eventually wear again. Have you seen the cost of buying and sewing asoebi fabrics recently? That’s why one of the most important principles behind how I wear mine is designing with versatility in mind. I design most of my custom-made outfits, it’s a passion I’ve explored even as a business before, but I digress. When putting the elements together, I consider all the ways I can restyle them because sustainable fashion is the best type of fashion.
Classic cuts with a little drama
When it comes to asoebi style, I prioritise classic silhouettes that don’t chase trends in an obvious way. Long dresses are always my go-to — they’re elegant, regal and flattering on many body types. If I opt for a short dress, it needs to be interesting. I love dresses with volume around the hips that create an exaggerated silhouette and keep things dramatic. While I get inspired by a Pinterest or Instagram style, I also infuse elements that reflect my personal style — a daring neckline and or dramatic sleeves.
I love a little cleavage. African women have beautiful, generous busts, and I think we deserve to show them off tastefully. Nothing obscene — just enough to feel confident and feminine. My asoebi outfits usually reflect this style, and my tailor often teases me about it.
Now, I know recently, there’s hardly an asoebi style without corsets, but I’m not about that lifestyle. While I appreciate the snatched effect, I rarely wear them. Comfort comes first for me, especially when I’ll be at a party for hours dancing, eating, and socialising. It’s the same reason I go without bras; they have a similar effect on me. If I absolutely must wear a corset, it has to be well-fitting without being suffocating.
My asoebi outfits are tastefully cut with classic details that make them wearable no matter what’s trending. Dramatic enough to stand out but simple enough to suit my taste, and I restyle them depending on the event.
Detachable details are my secret style weapon
I love detachable details on my asoebi outfit. Sleeves, drape details, anything I can take off to switch up the look or restyle later, makes the outfit more versatile. It’s the fashion gift that keeps giving. Once the designated event is over, I can tweak the outfit for other events.
Co-ord sets also fall into this category for me. It’s why I make most of my asoebi as a two-piece set. They offer a range of styling options: I can wear them together for the full dramatic effect or mix and match each piece for new looks at other events.
This approach also fits into my sustainability ethos. Having multiple styling options gives me confidence and makes it worth the money I spent on the fabric and tailoring. It’s also exciting when I see guests from my wedding restyle their outfits; it’s a reminder of the celebration for me.
If you’re thinking of the detachable route, consider adding extra sleeves, train or draped fabrics to your outfit. At future events, you can take off some of these to give the outfit a fresh look.
Read also: Desirée Iyama is setting long-lasting fashion trends with sustainable practices
Accessories are in the details
Growing up, I watched my mum get ready for owambe events with head-to-toe coordination — her shoes, purse and jewellery always in the same shade. It left an impression. Now, as a fashion editor, I know there are endless ways to style an outfit without being too matchy-matchy, but I still coordinate in my own way.
It’s all about accents for me. If my shoes have gold detailing, then my purse and jewellery need to reflect that too. Sometimes, silver or gold is the theme — but whatever I choose, the accents must align. On some days, my earrings match my shoes, or my necklace complements my purse, but it has to be cohesive. Other days, I pick a colour from the fabric and run with it for my accessories. It’s subtle, but it’s what brings the whole look together. The result is an effortlessly intentional style that nods to tradition without being stuck in it.
I also consider gele an important accessory. It’s part of the asoebi but a head accessory that completes the look. I also carry my wig in my bag because I’m a Lagos girl, and I come prepared. Having both options allows me to take photos with and without gele, which means two different vibes and double the content. It also gives the outfit room to shine without distraction. If you don’t wear wigs, keep your hair neatly done — sleek cornrows or a tidy bun, just in case you need to switch things up at the reception.
The right clutch makes the party
If you’re carrying a big tote to an owambe, we need to talk. If you carry a handbag, we need to have a serious talk, no matter what luxury brand it is. Special side eye to those of you who accessorise with Hermès Kelly at owambe parties. I have no words.
One of my asoebi style commandments is: always carry the right purse. There are party purses suitable for different events, and rarely do you see a work handbag or baguette on the list. Party clutches are non-negotiable on your asoebi. I go for something sparkly, beaded or metallic — mini top-handle bags only work when they’re dressy enough to pass as a clutch. It’s a distinction every fashion girl should understand: a bag is not a party purse. If you see me giving you the eye outside, you have the wrong bag. I will find you, and I will educate you. Okay, just kidding, but learn the differences!
You cannot outshine the bride, so show up in your best asoebi style
Let’s face it, it’s impossible to outshine a Nigerian bride. Our brides come ready, and rightly so — it’s their day. A stylish guest shows respect for the event, the celebrants, and even the memories. It’s part of the shared glamour we bring to our culture’s elaborate celebrations. Show up with an impeccable look and a gorgeous outfit that represents the celebration properly.
My asoebi style decides how I look in the photos, what my personal style projects, and how I can still feel like myself even when I’m in a fabric chosen by someone else. I honour the occasion, embrace cultural pride, and stand confidently in my fashion voice. It was the same when I was younger, and I believe it will continue till I can no longer be stylish, which is never.
Next time you get an asoebi invite, pause before rushing to the tailor with a saved Instagram screenshot. Think about versatility, comfort, personal style and the joy of wearing something you’ll love multiple times.
