When someone you’re connecting with suddenly vanishes without explanation, it can be incredibly confusing and painful. Psychologist Millie Huckabee shares insights on why this happens and offers advice on how to heal from ghosting.
When someone you were forming a relationship with suddenly disappears without explanation, you’ve been “ghosted.” This is a profoundly painful behavior that can quickly erode our self-esteem.
“Even if it says more about the ghoster than the ghosted person, it’s hard not to take it personally,” explains Millie Huckabee, a psychologist, in an article published on June 12, 2025, on the Psychology Today website.
Here’s her advice for quickly recovering from a ghosting situation:
Remember that it’s not your fault
When someone ghosts you, you might wonder what you did to deserve it. While these reactions are human, they’re misleading. “If you ask yourself if you would treat someone that way, the answer is probably no,” Millie Huckabee details. “That’s a sign of emotional maturity. Ghosters don’t have it.”
“They might be overwhelmed by their emotions, unable to communicate their discomfort, or afraid of confrontation,” she continues. “Instead of confronting their own discomfort or being honest, they disappear.” The key takeaway here is that ghosting says a lot about the people who do it, but nothing about your own worth.
Don’t reach out and do things for yourself
Unless your ghoster returns with an urgent reason to justify their silence, don’t respond to them: they’re capable of doing it again. “People capable of establishing a genuine connection don’t disappear without explanation,” the counselor adds. “And if they come back now, it might simply be to get what they want before doing it again.”
One of the best remedies for ghosting is to ground yourself in what you love and do what you love. You can watch your favorite movies or listen to your favorite artists, or do an activity you excel at. Finally, spend time with your loved ones, and don’t hesitate to talk to them. “Your friends have probably been through it too and will understand,” Millie Huckabee emphasizes.
Try again mindfully
Once you feel more stable, you can try again with someone, using everything you’ve learned. “Use your experience to quickly spot red flags and prioritize emotional reciprocity,” advises Millie Huckabee.
Being ghosted is painful, but it’s also a time when you grow. “You haven’t lost something good; you’ve avoided someone incapable of supporting you as you deserve,” the counselor continues. “What matters now is how you treat yourself with compassion, confidence, and kindness after the incident.”
This article was originally published by LR Media for marieclaire.fr on the Marie Claire France website.
